Breakups are painful – to say the least. It not only shatters a person’s perception of love and relationships, but also makes us question our inability to keep an individual happy.
Believing that it’ll be okay is hard, especially when the wound is still fresh. So, what can we do? Here’s what psychology has to say:
Our Brain Is Wired For Reward
It was found by researchers at University of Berkeley that our brains – when in love – tends to act and think the exact same way when it’s been programmed for reward. In this case, the reward is interacting with your ex.
The brain doesn’t stop from wanting what it can’t have, i.e. the reward of interaction with an ex. Often, it’s not the ex who is the drug, but the very idea of being in love. Cut away from this interaction; it’s normal to face painful withdrawal symptoms as well.
Our Brain’s Response to a Bad Breakup
Immediately following a painful breakup, stress chemicals are released by the brain in direct response to your feelings and thoughts about the incident.
This is the time when people act out of their character, and often follow this obsessive behavior is something volatile and dangerous – self-harming, etc. Stirred up emotions can be easily tempered with the help of psychology and the following pieces of common advice;
Identifying Anchors that Prevent You from Moving On
During your relationship – however long it must have been – you must have developed certain habits and behaviors. These conditioned habits/behaviors are triggered when you happen to visit the place of your first date or when ‘the’ song is playing on the radio.
You start to not only remember the ex, but all the feelings come rushing back, causing pain. Identify these anchors (what triggers you) and remove them from your life.
Realize It Is Difficult to Get Over a Broken Heart (But You Will Get There!)
Yes, it’s really difficult to get over a bad breakup but that’s only due to one reason. People going through heartbreak tend to strengthen their associations with the subject of their pain (the ex) which makes it hard to completely forget that person.
Deliberately visiting a favorite café, listening to songs that remind of the ex and even meeting his/her friend is the same as punishing yourself! Let this behavior go.
The toughest part of getting over a breakup is letting go. But with a little push towards the right direction, you can do so. Feel free to get help. It will assist you to heal and move on. Consult with Rekha Shrivastava over the possibility of happily moving on with hypnosis! pain management rochester,
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