If you’ve been married for a while, you probably remember the early days of your relationship.
You were in love and wanted to spend every waking moment together. But as time passed, you started to see each other less and things started to change.
Whether it was for a job that you moved to a different city than your spouse or another reason, there’s no denying that relationships have ups and downs.
But what if you’re the one pushing your partner away?
Think about what is causing this push-and-pull situation in your relationship. Some behaviors are considered passive-aggressive or passive-hostile and could make your partner feel like they are being thrown under the bus.
So, if you want to reduce friction in your relationship, here are some things to look out for.
1. Not listening to your partner’s feelings
Relationships are a give-and-take.
You may believe that you’re doing all the giving, but sometimes it’s hard to tell if you’re getting enough from your partner.
If you don’t listen to what they have to say, their feelings will go unheard and can lead to resentment in a relationship.
Even if you aren’t listening to your partner’s feelings, take notice of them in other ways. You might notice that your partner often seems frustrated or down or that there’s a difference between what they’re saying and how they’re saying it (for example, with an angry tone).
How can you start listening more?
Practice asking questions about what your partner means when they say something negative or upsetting. That’ll help them feel heard and understood, which will make them more likely to open up and share more with you.
2. Stonewalling your partner completely
Stonewalling your partner completely is a classic sign of emotional abuse.
This can be done in many different ways:
- You don’t talk about anything personal or important
- You withhold your love and affection for them
- You don’t listen to them when they do talk
- You are often sarcastic when talking to them
- You make excuses for not listening
- You interrupt them when they are talking
- You don’t tell them when you need something from them
3. Being secretive
Secrecy is a huge red flag for many relationships.
If you can’t share your problems with your spouse and need to hide things from them, it can be a sign that you’re not being transparent and that something is wrong in the relationship.
They may also start to feel like they don’t know you as well as they thought they did, which can hurt your relationship.
Thus, it’s essential to be honest with each other and work together to solve problems.
If you’re willing to learn how to identify and express your feelings for your partner, reach out to Blosson Hypnosis.
Rekha Shrivatastava is a certified hypnosis expert in Rochester, NY, offering hypnotherapy to help couples set free from the fear of expressing emotions. We also provide subconscious mind healing techniques for passive aggression, emotional exhaustion, and compassion fatigue.
Call us today at 585-281-2988 to schedule an appointment.
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