In a nutshell, self-sabotage is when you say you really want something and then go out of your way to make sure you don’t get it.
Self-sabotage is manifested in different ways including drug and alcohol abuse, procrastination, interpersonal conflict, over-eating, etc. It may seem trivial at first, but you end up digging a ditch of self-defeat too deep to climb out of.
If you want to get rid of self-sabotage, you first need to know its underlying reasons.
In this blog, we present 6 reasons for self-sabotage.
Perceived Fraudulence
As you move up in life, being promoted or finally getting your Master’s degree, the bar continues to get higher and the thought of inevitably crashing down starts to take root in your mind. You begin to dread the idea of your accomplishments getting noticed and the fear of being called a fake seems very real. This is also known as the imposter syndrome. What this means is that the person will perform the bare minimum to move ahead in life hoping to divert any attention. Soon, this condition leads to diversion and procrastination of important tasks just to avoid being seen as a potential fraud in the public’s eyes.
Fear of Failure
Self-sabotaging your relationships with the family, friend, girlfriend or boyfriend or under-achieving your career and health goals are not random acts and often require deep introspection. People often view this problem as a fear of success. But it’s not the success they fear so much as failure. It’s the possibility of being judged by those around you. The notion of being humiliated is powerful enough to dissuade people from striving toward their goals.
Control
You’d rather control failure yourself than allow it to take you by surprise. Voluntary failure gives the illusion of controlling the worst that life has to throw at you.
Procrastination
Procrastination is a common way of delaying problems until you are forced to face them. It’s a way of avoiding anxiety-provoking tasks and ignoring its consequences.
Harmful Consistency
It’s often stated that a human’s biggest fear is The Great Unknown. We prefer consistency even if it comes at the cost of complacence. So, while you may be overlooked and mistreated, in your mind it’s a far better discomfort than other unknowns the world has to offer.
Low Self-Worth
We as humans are ideological beings. We have a set of beliefs and values and strive hard to align them with our actions and goals. If our achievements in regard to our health, relationship, and careers are not in line with our beliefs, we sacrifice them.
Despite knowing the underlying reasons for self-sabotage, it can be difficult to change one’s mindset. Our certified hypnotist and rehabilitation counselor, Rekha Shrivastava, M.S., CH, CRC, CASAC, offers effective self-esteem strategies to overcome self-sabotaging habits. Contact us today!
Sources
- https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/how-be-yourself/201710/why-do-we-self-sabotage-0
- https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/the-mindful-self-express/201806/the-top-3-reasons-why-you-self-sabotage-and-how-stop
- https://www.more-selfesteem.com/self_sabotage.htm
- https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/wjz8bx/how-to-stop-self-sabotaging
- https://www.psychalive.org/self-sabotaging/
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